Since I'm not big on subtlety, I'll lay it out for you. I just want to be left alone on Mother's Day. I want to know my children are safe and well cared for, and I want that to be done away from me. Or I guess I don't mind if we're together, I just want you to do all of the thinking and calculating and risk management that keeping children alive entails. All of it. Not just the butt wiping and the snack making and the booboo kissing- I want you to make sure their car seat is installed properly, with the chest clip in the right place. I want you to notice which cars in a parking lot have a driver in them that could suddenly back out with no warning. I want you to anticipate and pack up all the crap they (might) need when we leave the house. I want you to carry on nonsensical conversations with them in the car so that I can just listen to music and not be like, "oooh yeah? And then what happened? The pirate stole ALL of the bananas and the whatevers? Wow. Mmm hmm." I want you to be the one who notices that they've been quiet for too long in another room, and then I want you to go sort out whatever mischief they've gotten into. And I want you to keep 'em alive totally on your own. That's the big thing. Mama's tired, k? My mind needs to rest for a full day. More than I need jewelry, flowers, and wine, my mind needs to rest. Don't get me wrong- I totally need all that other stuff- but this is numero uno on the list.
Okay so that's settled then, right? Cool Thanks! Love ya.
Moms, what is the One Thing you really want for Mother's Day? Do you want to be with your children, or do you want a rugrat-free day? Sound off in the comments below (and then send a screenshot to your partner for future reference ;)